I’m Spiritual, So Why Aren’t I Always Happy?


Desire can be defined as the longing for those things we feel we need or want – a bigger house, higher paying job, or perfect partner. If we trace back where desires come from, we find attachment and the fear that drives it. We are scared that we will not have love, or money, or status. We can even become attached to anger and resentment, sadness, or other emotions. Attachment exaggerates and distorts what we think we must have, and creates even more desire. More desire creates more attachments. It is a cycle that manifests into suffering.

Why Am I Unhappy?

One of the most effective mindsets to be in for happiness, is to be free of desire. Though we need the basics of life – food and shelter – other needs, if we don’t have the right attitude towards them, can lead to suffering.

Happiness arises in the mind, not outside of yourself. A spiritual person, no matter what teachings or path they follow, understands this.  They look within and to what has affected their view of themselves, and how they fit into the world.

We can become very attached to ideas that we hold true but are not based in reality. Ask yourself these questions:

  1. What are the dynamics of your life story that may be shaping what you desire?
  2. How is the way you learned to deal with certain situations, perhaps just to survive emotionally, affected the desires you have formed over time?
  3. Can you trace feelings and beliefs that lead to empty desires, or to events that you are ready to examine and let go of?

Secrets of The Subconscious Mind

The connection between subconscious anger and desire is something we rarely examine, but can reveal a lot about how we compensate for the hurt we think we can cure with external things.

When anger arises, it offers us an opportunity to stop for a moment to ask ourselves, “What desires are not being fulfilled?”

Your unconscious is controlling your world. The universe is not the master, you are! Whatever you are asking for, you are receiving. There’s a voice inside your being that is stronger than your conscious voice, and it’s manifesting your reality.

When you ask the universe for something and it doesn’t deliver, don’t get angry. You will only give that unconscious voice even more power. That voice comes from all the pain, disappointments and jealousies you have experienced, from the moment you were born to where you are now.

When you look at the life you’ve led, and examine the root causes of your attitudes and actions, you will have the information to find your truth. Instead of blaming the world when you are having a hard time, stop and look inside. Take the energy of blame and shift it back into dealing with your own life.

Replace Greed with Gratitude

Making a conscious effort to let go of these kinds of desires, and practice acceptance of the plans the universe has for us, can open doors to wonderful surprises and new energy. When we become aware of our desires, we interact with the world and begin to live with a higher level of consciousness and gratitude. You are creating your own life, all the time, by how you react to it and move through it.


For more on attachments and desire, read

DESIRE: Never Fulfilled but Grows